Normalizing Factor
by Cat Carroll
Summary: Logan recruits a mysterious and unexpected doctor to help Max's increasing seizures. ML SML aplenty
1. Unwelcome Announcement

"YOU DID WHAT

"YOU DID WHAT?" Max's shout echoed throughout Logan's penthouse.She wasn't sure if she was more shocked or furious that he would do something so high-handed without telling her first.There they were, having a nice dinner, and then he drops this on her.Like food was going to soften her up first.A Cale culinary masterpiece would work to get some work out of her for Eye's Only, but this?No way.

"Max, I didn't want to tell you until there was something to tell!" Logan tried to defend himself.She was impossible!He'd been working on this for weeks now, pushing aside very important projects, just for her, and she starts acting like he invited Lydecker to dinner.

She strode over to him, and bent over him menacingly."You," she snarled, her finger in his face, "do NOT give out my medical history to ANYONE without MY consent, are we clear on that?"She straightened, and grabbed her jacket off of the back of the couch.

"Gotta blaze," she called over her shoulder.She stormed towards the door, and then stumbled a little, falling against the doorframe.Logan wheeled over to her quickly, recognizing the now-familiar symptoms of a seizure.They had been coming on more frequently, and the Tryptophan wasn't working as well anymore.She jerked again as her body began to convulse.Her legs wouldn't hold her weight anymore, and she fell right into his lap.

If this weren't real I'd swear she planned this, he thought, taking her to the couch.She gets near me, and I forget everything else.She was shaking harder, but clawed at her jacket pocket, finding a few pills.She managed to dry-swallow two, dropping three others on the ground.Lately, half a dozen were needed to slow a seizure.

Logan got her on the couch, and then got the bottle of Tryptophan out of the bathroom.He'd started keeping a stockpile of it, but Max was going through it way faster now.He got her to swallow several more pills, but it still took a while for the seizure to ease.There were a few aftershocks, but Logan could see the worst was over.For now at least.

"Max," he said softly, touching her hair.She looked asleep, but you could never tell with her."I just want you to get better.I told him so he could help you."She didn't reply, just snuggled onto the couch a little more.He sighed.Let me help you for once, he thought, watching her.


	2. Discussion

"So then he starts telling me that he already told this guy everything," Max complained the next night to Original Cindy

"So then he starts telling me that he already told this guy everything," Max complained the next night to Original Cindy."And then he's all mad because I'm not happy he's blabbing all over the world."She leaned over the pool table and took the next shot.The striped ball slapped into the side pocket, and she walked around the table to set up her next shot.

"Original Cindy needs to get this straight," Cindy said."Your boy goes out and spends all this time and cheddar to get you a private doctor to take care of your problem, right?Mmmhmm.Original Cindy cannot comment."

Max glared at her."Don't tell me you're on his side."

Cindy went to her, and put a hand on her shoulder."Boo," she said quietly, "it's that bitch in your head causing all the problems and you put it in there to cover my back when things got tight."She continued in her normal tone."Me telling you to not do something that might help, that's like…that's like me telling Sketchy he's invited over with my lickety for a little all-night gong banging."

There was a loud thump from behind them.They looked over their shoulder to see Herbal trying to wake Sketchy up.Herbal was trying to keep from laughing more than he was helping.They'd walked up to hear Cindy declaring she was inviting Sketchy over for some fun, and the poor guy had just overloaded and passed out.The girls doubled over laughing.

They all sat down, and Cindy bought the first pitcher of beer for the group.Sketchy was still glaring at her for ruining the thought he might have finally achieved his greatest dream in life: getting two girls at the same time.They relaxed for a while; all of them glad to not have to hear another bip-bip-bip for the rest of the night.

Max's pager went off.Logan.Figures.She sighed and got up.She probably should ignore it, but knowing Logan, her feelings were at the bottom of the list, and there was a widow or orphan in need of a genetically enhanced rescue.It was a reason to cruise real fast on her baby though.She got up.

"Gotta blaze on out," she said.The others smirked.

"Hey Boo," Cindy called out as Max went to leave.Max paused."Think seriously about it, aiight?"Max smiled and left Crash.As soon as Max was out the door, she was on the phone.

"You reached the number you dialed," she heard Logan's machine pick up.She glared at the phone.He better be there, or she was going to go there and explain to him why he does not waste Original Cindy's time or dime.

"Pick up this damn phone or I will be planting my…" Logan's voice cut off her rant.

"Sorry," he said."I was in the kitchen.Did she listen to you?"

"No doubt, no doubt," Cindy replied."She not hyped on the whole thing yet, but she a little more open to the idea."

"Thanks for the help," Logan said."She actually listens to you."

"You sure you can trust this guy?"Cindy asked."Boo better not be walking into heat again on Original Cindy's account."She wanted Max to get some help, but she wanted her to be careful.

"I checked him out," Logan said."All his credentials are legit all the way.I don't want anything to happen to Max either."

"Yeah, well, you treat my girl nice, you hear?"

"I hear," Logan said, and she could hear the smile in his voice.She hung up and went back to the table with Herbal and Sketchy.Logan had sworn to do something to make up for upsetting Max the night before in order to get Cindy to agree to help.She would have anyways though.Max's seizures were getting worse, and if this doctor could help, that was good enough for Original Cindy.

Later that night Max had to admit there was a plus side to Logan making her mad.Every time he did, they'd end up making up over something fabulous from his kitchen.Where he kept his stock of pre-Pulse wine, she'd never know, but she hoped it would never run out.She'd walked into his apartment, lit with candlelight, and inhaled a lovely scent of cooked beef, onion, mushroom, and some other stuff.

"Hey there," Logan said from the kitchen.He had a tray with him.Shish kabob was lying on a bed of wild rice.There looked to be chunks of real beef skewered with onions, mushrooms, bell peppers and cherry tomatoes.The table was already set for two with a bottle of wine chilling on ice.She had to grin.She wasn't sure if this was something planned or if he really had the ability to casually make a gourmet meal on the fly.

"Hey yourself," she replied.She knew she should be yelling at him, but he'd made this really great dinner, and she was really hungry, and he looked so…she had to admit it, adorable waiting for her.Maybe it was the candlelight.She took off her jacket."No widows or orphans tonight?"

He gave her that slightly embarrassed grin that he did so well."I made sure they were all in bed early tonight," he said, and put the food on the table.So we can have some time together, he thought.God, she was beautiful, standing there, the candlelight illuminating every feature of her lovely face.He turned away quickly, wanting to shut out those thoughts.What did he have to offer her except for some gourmet food?

She sat down and served them while he poured the wine.When had that become their little ritual?They both ate in silence for a while, their minds on the same subject.Max knew this was a truce offering, but what Cindy had said was sticking with her.Logan had spent a lot of time trying to get this doctor to see her.He didn't just give up his time that easily.The food was excellent though.She was actually glad about the brownout.The candles made everything seem so much more…special.

"Max," Logan finally said."About last night…I should have asked, and I'll call Sebastian in the morning and cancel the whole thing."

"Well," Max said quickly, "who is this doctor anyways?I mean, you KNOW you can trust him?"Logan silently blessed Original Cindy.

"He was a child prodigy," Logan said."Graduated high school at twelve, got his masters degree at 16.He went to medical school, and graduated at 20, and also started working on his PhD that he received three years later.He went into research and started working in neurology, specializing in seizures.He was one of the top people in the country, no doubt."

"So who did Wonder-Boy get after him?" Max asked.This doctor had to have done something to owe a favor to Eye's Only.

"About two years after the Pulse, government funding was completely dry for any further research.He went to work for a pharmaceutical company but found out that they were using live human test subjects.They wanted him to do little things like neurosurgery on healthy people for his research to give them epilepsy so that he could find a cure for it.He decided to blow the whistle rather than kill innocent people."

"My predecessor, Los Ojos, was the one who actually did the story.Got a lot of people in some serious trouble.The doctor was a seriously marked man.He was brought to Seattle, and given a different identity.He had to leave medicine altogether, but he has kept up on things.He's got a new life and a new job, but he agreed to one special case out of respect to Los Ojos."

There.He'd made his case.Please say you'll see him, Logan thought.The seizures scare the hell out of me.I know normality is out of the question, but something close to it wouldn't be bad at all, would it?

"So he already knows I'm the original special case child?" Max asked nonchalantly.

"I had to tell him so he'd be prepared on why you have seizures and why they'd gotten worse.He doesn't know everything, just that you had an implant."He prepared for the yelling.She just took another drink of wine and pursed her lips a little.He had to look away.She looked too ready to kiss when she did that.

"OK, so I'll see your boy.But he makes one wrong move, and he's out the nearest high window."

Logan was visibly relieved.There was one detail about the doctor's life that he'd left out, but he'd had to.He couldn't even tell Cindy.If Max knew, she'd never agree to see him in a million years.She'd be furious at him for keeping it a secret, but he had to.


	3. Meeting the Doctor

"Max, so nice of you to grace us with your presence," Normal said in his usual blandly acid tone

"Max, so nice of you to grace us with your presence," Normal said in his usual blandly acid tone."And only twenty minutes late today!Did your bed catch on fire this morning?"

She ignored him as she cruised to her locker.He turned to Sketchy who was balancing his bike on the front tire, and bouncing it."Hot run," he yelled, and tossed the package in his hands to Sketchy.It bounced off him, and he tumbled to the ground."This is a business people, not a circus!" he hollered to everyone and no one in particular as Sketchy climbed up and got on his battered bike.

"Hey Boo," Cindy said to Max as she got ready for another bip-filled day at Jam Pony."You talk to your boy-toy?"

"He's not my toy," Max protested automatically."But we did talk."

"And?"

"I'm going to talk to his doctor.It's just a consultation, I am not letting him start poking and prodding," Max answered quickly."Logan's setting it up so I can meet him today after work."

Cindy silently blessed Logan's excellent cooking skills."You need Original Cindy at your back, she there aiight?"

"Thanks," Max said, throwing her backpack over her shoulder, "but I think I can handle sitting in a paper dress by myself."

Normal threw her a package, and she was off, weaving through the streets of Seattle.It was a pretty typical day, cloudy and wet.She made her runs more efficiently than usual, her mind too much on the doctor's appointment than trying to mess with Normal.She didn't even stop by Logan's for lunch as she was starting to get into the habit of doing.The Jam Pony gang noticed her detachment today, but didn't comment.Herbal and Sketchy thought maybe she was up to something with her boyfriend and didn't want Normal to notice a long lunch or ducking out early or something.

She finally did her last run.She pulled into Jam Pony, and tossed the slip to 

Normal."Why Max," he drawled."Every one of your runs came back with a signature.Did you have a religious experience today and decided not to be a slacker anymore?"

"Make me late for my appointment, and you'll be the one having the religious experience," she replied acidly.Her stomach was in knots.The last time a doctor had "treated" her for seizures was back at Manticore.She knew in her head that it would be different, but she kept remembering all the things they'd done to her then, how the sound of the saw would reverberate and then…

"You are unwell, my sister?" Herbal said, breaking Max from her thoughts.She looked a little sick.

"No, I'm fine," she said conjuring up a smile for her friend."I'm just running late for something."She jumped on her bike and pedaled away.

Sketchy looked at Herbal, more confused than regular."Max was worried about being on time?" he questioned.

"Women are strange creatures my friend," Herbal replied.

Max ended up at Sebastian's place.He had a lab there worthy of most medical hospitals.She'd turned back a few times and started to go home, but then went back.She was doing this for herself, she said firmly, so what if Logan wanted it too.This was so stupid.Doctor would have no idea what he was seeing, and would probably tell her to take some aspirin and sleep it off or something.

She didn't pick Sebastian's lock, even after seeing Logan's Aztec there.She had told him not to come, but felt relief that he was there.He might be a sidekick, but he was a damn good one that she wouldn't trade for anything.Especially when she was going to an actual doctor.Logan answered the door, and took her in.Sebastian was at his computer as normal.

"So what does this doctor really know?" she asked, mostly as a way to delay actually going in.

"Dr. Ronald knows that you were a part of a genetics-testing group," Sebastian's computerized voice said."He knows that due to the research being done, you suffer seizures.He does not know about Manticore, but he does know about the implant."He paused."Dr. Ronald is waiting for you now."Max noticed the cameras in the room she was supposed to go in were off.Odd for Sebastian, but he was trying to give her some privacy.Logan must have filled him in on her problem with being watched while being poked and prodded.She didn't like being a scientific show and tell.

The hall seemed a mile long to Max.Logan didn't offer to accompany her and she didn't ask.She was going to have to do this on her own.She finally got to the door, and opened it, looking down.She didn't want to see medical equipment everywhere that was supposed to be used on her body."I'm here," she said.

"And only 45 minutes late," a familiar voice said.Max jerked her head up to see the doctor, his back to her, looking in a manila folder."I do pity your boss dealing with slack…" Normal said, turning around.Their eyes met.Jaws dropped.

"Normal?" Max gasped out.Logan had to have known.She was going to kill him.In a terribly horrific way.One that involved piranha fish.

"Why is it I can never get away from you people?" he said dryly.He thought for a second about her medical file he'd been flipping through."When you said you'd had amateur brain surgery to keep from stroking out, you weren't being flippant were you?"

Max was still trying to connect Dr. Ronald the Wonder Boy to the headset-wearing boss that yelled things like hot run and bip-bip-bip.She wasn't doing a good job of it.True, he was wearing a white coat, and his headset was missing, but he was still the same Normal she'd known.This was just so not right.

"What kind of sick joke is this?" she snapped, finally forming a coherent sentence."You're not a doctor!"

He sighed, a Normal-is-annoyed sigh that she was very familiar with."I do not currently practice medicine, but I am educated as a doctor," he said firmly.He was looking at Max very strangely.She was all of what…nineteen, twenty?She'd said 21 on her job application, but that didn't mean anything.When had she had time to be in a genetics research facility?He thought about GenCorp.They didn't care about legal age either.Things clicked together.

Max seemed to relax a little.It was finally starting to sink in.Normal was anything but.Logan had said the doctor was given a new life, but he never said it went this far.No wonder the guy looked down on all the riders so much.He really was the genius he always played.She remembered when he defined moron and idiot for them.He probably was fluent in both Latin and Greek on his own.

"I want the truth!" they both said suddenly at the same time.That dispelled the tension a little.She gave him her most charming smile.Well, it always seemed to work on Logan.

"So how does a tricked up doc go from the lab to the lab rats?" Max asked, not sure for the first time if Logan had told her the truth.

"And how does a genetically altered human being go from being the lab rat to the best slacker in the bunch?" Normal retorted.Max tensed.Sebastian said Manticore had not been mentioned to the doctor.

"They didn't have to tell me the whole truth," he said, seeing her get ready to bolt."It's evident in the medical history.The only reason I agreed to help was to meet the flawed chimera."

"I'm not flawed!" she snapped, hating that word.Lydecker's word.

"Really?"He seemed a little bemused."So you don't suffer seizures based on the amateurish cross-wiring of DNA?"

"Like you could have done better," she replied.

"I know I could have."He paused."Doesn't matter.Up on the table."

"What?"She was shocked at his order.

"You obviously did a very big favor for someone who did me a big favor once," he replied, opening a drawer, and getting out some equipment."So, despite being late, I'm going to help you."He turned back to her."But none of this is going to be an excuse to be late to work tomorrow."She wasn't getting on the table.Oh well, there was something else he needed from her.He handed her a plastic cup and gestured towards an adjoining door."Bathroom's in there.I'm sure you know what to do from there. 


	4. The Truth Game

"So do you guys actually do anything with this stuff, or is just a domination thing," Max said, a little humiliated to be hand

"So do you guys actually do anything with this stuff, or is just a domination thing," Max said, a little humiliated to be handing her boss a cup of warm urine.Putting it in his coffee would be funny, but this was not.If Cindy ever found out she peed in a cup for Normal, she'd never let Max live it down.

"The domination thing is the paper gown," Normal replied.He handed one to Max."The urine is to see what you've been smoking lately."

Max was torn between running out of there, and killing him.She wanted to do both.No, she wanted to kill Logan more.He knew Dr. Ronald was Normal."I thought we were just consulting," Max said, edging a little towards the door.

"You consult, and while you're wasting time, I'll cure you," Normal said.He was doing something to her pee.She couldn't leave.At least not while he had some of her bodily fluids.Normal sighed."Even slacks when it comes to her own health," he muttered.

"Hey, I got a right to know what you want to do to my body," she retorted.Normal checked the stick he had in her specimen cup, then threw it away and wrote something down.She grabbed the gown and went back into the bathroom to put it on.God, this was humiliating.At least she knew he couldn't talk about it.

She came back out and sat down on the table.It was ice cold.She was freezing.Did all doctors require the temperature to be set near zero degrees?There was a sheet at the end at least for her to put over her legs. She was glad she shaved before dinner with Logan the night before.Normal finally brought a tray over and started to do a workup.Blood pressure, reflexes, he even checked her ears and throat.Maybe he just enjoyed doing this.

She did have to draw a line."You really expect me to answer that?" she asked in response to his questioning about her last gynecological visit, and the number of sexual partners she'd had in the last two years.

"Has it been that long, or are you having trouble counting that high?" he said absently, looking at something else in her folder.He looked back at her directly."This is not to embarrass you, I'm trying to help.Stop thinking of me as your boss, and think of me as your doctor please."

"You do know what half of my body you supposed to be taking care of right?" Max said unconvinced.If he wanted to give her a pelvic, she was out of there.

He started listening to her heartbeat with a stethoscope."Every part of the body affects the rest," he replied."Breathe in deep, exhale, okay, again.Mmmhmm.We need to isolate what causes the seizures and find out how to control them."

"I start seizing when the serotonin levels drop," she said."Mystery solved.How do you fix it?"

He gave her his best you-are-idiot look.She got it quite often at Jam Pony."And why do they drop?Where's the trigger?The mutated genetics cause it, but there's something setting it off and then stopping it or you'd be dead already."

He went behind her and started listening to her breathing from her back.Well, this wasn't as bad as Manticore.Then she felt him move her hair.She jumped, but it was already too late.He was looking at her very strangely."Is that the implant?" he asked.

She nodded."And the barcode?" he asked.

She shrugged."Too much beer, too much fun.You wake up with a hangover and a new ink job."She sounded casual enough.

He nodded like he believed her."You're a chimera with a tracking system stamped onto your neck," he said."Exactly what genetics testing facility did you come from?"She didn't answer."Was it government or private?" he asked further.Why was she so scared of telling him what was going on?Max scared.That was a new concept.

"It was just one of those standard guys in white coats with needles kind of place," she finally said.

"Its name?"

"What does it matter?" she said, "can't you fix me on your own?"

It was hard to cut through Normal's outer shell.Nothing got to him.Even finding out his girlfriend had recently lost her special friend didn't bother him.And she was the one less than human?

"Max, I can't help you if you're holding back.You can either tell me the truth, or I'll just fire you now and we'll both be on our way."

"You can't fire me!" she shot back.

"You have a neurological condition that brings on seizures without notice.You could have one at work.Then there would go the insurance premiums."How did he manage to sound so triumphant, but not change expression at all?

"Like you so up on the truth Mr. I am the brilliant doctor running a two bit messenger service."

"Why don't we play a game?" Normal suggested.

"Like what, play doctor?" she said sarcastically.

"Truth.You ask a question, I'll answer it honestly.Then I ask."He was trying to be reasonable, but when did reason ever work with Max.He could be in Canada fishing right now.Los Ojos had offered him a little cabin in the mountains.He'd refused and now he was trying to reason with the most stubborn female he'd ever met.

"Why are you working for Jam Pony and not something better."

"I own Jam Pony.Was the research facility government or private?"

Oh, God.He wasn't her boss.He was THE boss.No wonder he acted like he could do anything there.He could."Government.You own Jam Pony?"

"Again, yes.How old were you when you were put in there for testing?"

"Hey," she protested."I didn't ask my question!"

"You asked 'you own Jam Pony?'I said yes.It's my turn."He quirked an eyebrow and waited for her response.

"I was a kid," she said vaguely."Why aren't you out healing people, or saving the world or something instead of being stuck here?You got a new identity thing going on you could have started healing the sick and afflicted."

"There are people after me even now," he replied honestly.When you cause the government to shut down a company that made hundreds of millions of dollars, people tend to have long memories.There's a price on the head of Dr. Reagan Ronald.Not something you'd understand anyways.What was the name of the facility you were in?"Her expression clearly said 'you might be surprised'.Interesting.

Like he'd know the name of a top-secret project anyways she finally decided."Manticore," she said.For the first time since they met, she actually saw real expression on his face.Shock.How the hell did he know what Manticore was?

"You know don't you?" she asked a little unsteadily.Good thing it was his turn for a question.

"There was recruitment among the best and brightest for a special genetics project," he said."One of my friends signed up for it.I refused.I saw him a few years later, well on his way to becoming an alcoholic.He told me he'd sold his soul.He said genetic engineering like we'd never seen was going on there.Manticore he called it.Kids were being put into military training.They'd been bred there.He couldn't take it anymore.Killed himself a few days later."

Her eyes narrowed at the thought of a Manticore doctor.In her book, the only good one was a dead one.But she couldn't stay now.He knew way too much about it.Maybe he was lying and really had worked on it.Maybe he was going to try and trade her to Lydecker.That's what those doctors seemed to like to do.

"I'm out of here," she said, and grabbed her clothes.She turned to leave, but then grabbed the back of her neck and cried out.The seizure violently overwhelmed her entire body before she could do anything.She hit a metal cart, sending medical equipment crashing down as she spiraled into blackness.


	5. Talking it Over

"Looks like she's rejoining the world," Max heard Normal say from a thousand miles away

"Looks like she's rejoining the world," Max heard Normal say from a thousand miles away.Her eyes fluttered, and then closed again, the bright light overhead burning them.She was lying down, and it felt like she had bugs all over her.Something clingy and sticky at any rate.

"Max?" she heard Logan say."You there?"

She remembered everything now.Damn, it wasn't a real bad nightmare; Normal was a doctor and knew about Manticore.She'd peed in a cup for him.And Logan knew all this time.

"Logan?" she muttered.She could feel him lean closer.She grabbed the front of his turtleneck, and hauled him up so that he was a few inches from her, his blue eyes wide.He thought she was still mostly out of it."Did you forget to tell me something?" she snarled, obviously alert.She pushed him back into his wheelchair, and sat up.

There were wires all over her."Don't touch them," Normal ordered seeing her reaching for one.He was checking something on a machine.He notated what he was seeing in her chart, and then went to another one."Interesting," he muttered.

"What the hell is going on?" she finally had to ask.The last thing she remembered was that she was going to leave, and then there was a pain, and then…nothing.

"You had a seizure," Logan said."I heard a crash and came in."They both looked at Normal.

"Oh, you managed to knock over a table when you fell," he said absently, reading a test result.If this was right, then…it didn't make any sense though."Since you weren't in the mood to object, I ran a few tests."

She looked outraged at both of them."I am so out of here!" she declared, and started ripping off wires.It hurt like hell, but she was not in the mood to play around any more.She'd had enough of people experimenting on her body without permission.Where were her clothes?There they were at the end of the table.

She jumped up, and grabbed her jeans, still fuming."Max," Logan tried to reason, "it was the only way he could get a reading while you were having a sei…"his words were cut off when she spun his chair around so that he was facing away from her.He heard the whistling of the denim and realized she was putting on her jeans.Oh Lord, she was mostly naked right behind him.He could feel himself start to sweat.

Normal had his back to her as she pulled up her jeans under the hospital gown.She yanked it off and pulled her shirt back on, furious at them both.She went to storm out of the room, her exit being spoiled by Normal's bland voice."I'll give you the results tomorrow," he called out.When he was sure she was gone, he looked at Logan."Well, that went better than you expected."Logan could only nod, and hope she would be okay.

Later that night Logan sat in front of his computer, trying to work on his next hack.He'd paged Max four times, but she had yet to respond.He wondered if she would go into work the next morning.He ran his hands through his hair, giving up all hope of getting any work done that night.He'd screwed up when he didn't tell Max everything, but she would never have gone if he had.He grabbed the phone and paged one last time for the night.If she wasn't going to call, then she wasn't going to call.What if she'd had another seizure?He was worried about her, and sitting there alone, he realized it wasn't the worry a boss has about his employee…was it the worry a friend has or…there was a weird beeping noise from his balcony.

He grabbed the gun from his desk, and wheeled himself over carefully.Max was sitting out there.He'd long ago given up hope she would ever do anything in a normal way.She had a key, but rarely used it.It was either a window or a picked lock for her.She said keys weighed her down.For a moment he sat there, admiring the moonlight on her face.She was nothing short of exquisite.He put the back in his desk and went out to her.

"Got your page," she said, not looking at him when he came out.She was staring out into the skyline.

"I was worried about you," he admitted.While she wasn't looking at him he felt free to trace every curve of her with his eyes.

"All's cool," she said.But it wasn't.They both knew it.

"If I had told you," Logan began, "you would have never gone."

"Friends don't trick friends," she cut him off."I thought we got beyond that tricking stage after the mirror."There was silence.He should have been honest no matter what the reason.

"All I know is every seizure could be your last," Logan said hotly.Thinking of that made him feel sick."If you had one while riding your motorcycle, or even while you were on top of the Space Needle and fell," he broke off."I don't want anything to happen to you."

She jumped to her feet, trying to hold onto the anger.He had absolutely no right to hide this from her.Then, he helped Normal while she was down.That was absolutely whacked.You did not play a friend like that.You always covered a friend's back.That's why she had the implant in the first place.Caring was reserved for a relationship that they didn't have.

"You didn't think I could make the decision on my own," she yelled."Whatever.You just worried 'cause I might not be able to save one of the huddled masses on your command."

Logan had no idea what made him react the way he did.There was no rational explanation for what he did, he just acted.He grabbed her wrist unexpectedly.He had gained a great deal of upper body strength from being in the chair, and pulled her back.She wasn't expecting him to move, and when she was pulled backwards, somehow she hit the edge of his wheelchair, and tumbled into his lap.

Logan caught her easily, his anger dissipating with her face inches from his.He let go of her wrist expecting her to jump up and run off into the night as she always did whenever things got tense.His free hand touched her face, his thumb running across her full lower lip.So soft.He crossed the space between them, his lips pressing gently against hers, almost like he was asking permission.

This was not what Max had been expecting.She wanted to storm off and rage at him for hours as she drove recklessly through the streets.But now…his mouth was as warm and sweet as it had been the one time they had kissed before.Her arms wrapped around his neck, and the kiss became deeper as months of tension began to be released.Was this what he'd been thinking about when he wrote that poem about her?She could feel his hand running up her leg, over her rear, and then up her back to her neck, and then back down again.

This was so not right.Absolutely whacked.To hell with rational, she thought.Never was my strong suit anyways.


	6. Aftermath

"And

"And?" Original Cindy asked eagerly as they changed in the locker room.Max had come home well after she'd gone to bed, and they had only been able to discuss it on the way to work.So far she hadn't said much about the doctor, but Cindy was more interested in the action between her home girl and Mr. Moneybags anyways.Bout time they got the juices flowing.

"Nothing happened and he got upset," Max replied.She was still floored about what had happened.Was it a fluke, or was there something more intended there?

"Typical man," Cindy said."Kinda hoping he wouldn't be the lead around by the little leg kind of guy, but you know how it is."

"No," Max said."That's not it."She said her words slowly and with great emphasis."Nothing…happened."

Now Cindy understood."Boy's dog wouldn't bark?" she asked a little incredulous.Max nodded. Damn, she was glad she was on the all-girls team.Nothing like that to worry about ever.

"We have packages to be delivered people!Bip-Bip-Bip!" Normal yelled before anything further could be discussed.In some ways hearing him yell like that was a relief to Max.This was a Normal she could cope with.That whole Dr. Ronald thing was too weird for even the queen of weird to deal with.

They got busy delivering packages.At lunch the Jam Pony gang met up together in a park.There were a couple of guys on bikes showing off, and it was fun to watch them crash and burn in front of their girlfriends.Sketchy was still too bruised from ending up on the floor the day before to play with them.

"You guys noticed Normal acting weird today?" Sketchy asked the others.

"It would seem the winds of his mind blow in a new course," Herbal replied.One would expect Sketchy to look blank at that, but he'd had years to perfect Herbal-ese.Herbal thought Normal seemed a little distracted today.

"Original Cindy with that," Cindy commented."Boy's got all sorts of books and stuff with him.Forgot a signature today, and all he said was to be more careful.Handed out another box, and opened his magazine right back up.And, get this, Normal took lunch AWAY from the desk today."The others could only stare in disbelief.Normal could leave the building during business hours?There'd only been one occasion they'd ever even heard of that happening.

Max didn't know what to say.The magazine was an old copy of "The New England Journal of Medicine", and she'd seen one of the books.It was "The Physiology of the Brain, The Chemical of the Mind".Normal was doing a little research.He'd seemed like he was happy or something.It was like when he was dating that girl-boy he'd liked so much.Well, he was back to what he loved the best.If she didn't have a case to interest a doctor, nobody did.

Her pager went off.Logan.That was a good sign.He'd been so upset the night before.They'd made out for a while, and then he got all kinds of nasty with her.He'd asked her to leave, and gave her some kind of lame-ass excuse about needing to get work done.She'd torn out of there, embarrassed and furious that she had been expecting him to take her into the bedroom and…then it hit her.She'd been flying low through the streets, and she realized what had been wrong with him.Like that mattered!Well, he was a guy.

"See you later," she said jumping up.

"You going to be at Crash tonight, boo?" Original Cindy asked.She wanted to get Max alone to ask her about the doctor.

Max shrugged."Yeah, sure."She smiled and waved."Later!"She jumped on her bike and pedaled off.

Logan was sitting at his computer, pretending to be working.He actually was trying to, but Max consumed every thought.The softness of her mouth, the way her hands played in his hair, the curves of her body under his hands.She wasn't shy about touching him back, and that's when it dumped on him like a bucket of ice-cold water.He was dead in that way.God, he was an idiot.He wanted her, but she deserved more than half a man.

He heard the door rattle, and there she was.Just play it cool, he thought.Just play like nothing happened."Logan?" Max called.Even her voice was exquisite.

"Yeah," he called back.She walked in.Even in her grungy Capri pants and loose shirt she was beautiful.

He couldn't look at her directly.He could see her reflection in the monitor, and that was almost more than he could bear."Dr. Ronald called and said he wanted to talk to you after work," Logan said.

Max was hurt that he wouldn't even look at her.So it was true.It was the fastest way to kill a friendship.To Hell with him then."He say what was up?" she asked, trying to be casual.If he wanted to act like nothing was different, then so could she.

"He just said he wanted to talk to you about test results," Logan replied, still not looking at her.

"That's cool," she commented."Sebastian's crib?"

"That would be the best place," Logan answered.

"You going to be there?"She had no idea why she asked, she just did.Actually she knew why.If the results were bad, she wanted him there.Well, someone at least.Original Cindy couldn't because of Normal.He was the next best thing, being an ex-close friend and all.

"I don't know," he said."I have a lot of work to do."

He couldn't see the sudden fury in her eyes.That was it!If Eye's Only was so damn important to him, then he could kiss her ass all the way home.All this over not being able to…what kind of person did he think she was?He think she would laugh?That compassion had been engineered out of her?

She whipped his chair around so that he was forced to face her.Now he could see the anger and frustration."You think last night makes you less of a man?" she yelled."Not being there for people you call your friends, that makes you less of a man!"

"Max," he tried to say, but the slamming of the front door was his only answer.


	7. Diagnosis

"O, am I 'oing to wiv oh wha

"O, am I 'oing to wiv oh wha?" Max asked Normal after work.She'd been upset to not see Logan's Aztec out front, but who the hell cared about him anyways.She had test results to get and a Logan-less life to lead.Maybe Normal would have good news and she would spend the next several nights celebrating at Crash with her friends.Her REAL friends.

"Please do not try to speak with the thermometer in your mouth," Normal replied."It will affect the reading."Then he correctly translated her."I believe you are going to live, it's the quality of life I'm concerned about."The thermometer beeped, and he took it out."At least your temperature is normal," he commented.

"So you got some answers from all those books you were digging through?" she asked, glad to have the dumb thing out of her mouth.

"Not really," he replied, flipping through her chart.If he didn't give it to her soon, she was going to kill him."But they did give me some ideas."

"And?"

"I don't think your problem is accidental," he replied matter-of-factly.

"If it was on purpose they wouldn't have been dissecting us to find out how to stop it," she snapped, remembering far more clearly than she wanted to the sight of Jack on a surgical table.

"They were dissecting because they were rank amateurs, and didn't know how to do a job properly," he replied in the same unflappable tone."You weren't supposed to have seizures, you were just supposed to not be happy unless you were at Manticore."

Max stared at him doubtfully."Lydecker wasn't exactly concerned with our happiness," she informed him."As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure his goal was to make us miserable."

"How old were you when you escaped?" he asked.

"Nine or so.I don't know my real birth date."

"You were a little young then to actually need the serotonin."

Max glared at him."Yeah right, we were just better at hiding the seizures then."

He sighed, and she had to restrain herself from hitting him.He might be Dr. Wonder-Boy, but he was always Normal."I meant the other effects of serotonin.It also helps you keep you emotions regulated.People who have certain kinds of mental illnesses suffer from a lack of serotonin."

No Max was starting to understand."They made us so if we left Manticore we were supposed to be all mental so we'd want to come back."

"Except they screwed up so that you don't process the serotonin properly, thus causing the seizures," he said."I think that you used to make enough, it's just you excreted it rather than use it.With the implant though, you aren't making as much as before, so that's why the Tryptophan isn't working like it used to."

Max blushed.She was discussing her bodily excretions with Normal."So, they wanted to do it to us.Makes sense.We'd all have to come running back for our meds to keep our heads on straight and be good little soldiers.How do you fix it?"

"Since the Tryptophan still does work to a point, I'm going to keep you on it, but I want you to start taking another drug called Depecote to help."He took out a bottle of pills and handed it to her.

She took the bottle gingerly, as if it were a rattlesnake rather than a plain brown bottle with a childproof lid."What's this going to do?"

"Depecote helps with both epilepsy and some mental illnesses like manic-depressiveness.It should help to control the seizures and balance out the serotonin levels so that the seizures don't come on as often."He paused, and then smirked."It may have some effects on your personality and moods, but I'll write a note to your boss to let him know that this is better than the alternate."

"Thanks," she said sarcastically.She looked back at him, a little worried."What kind of effects on my personality, because I like what I got just fine."

"Well, it can cause sudden mood changes, you may sleep more or develop other odd sleeping patterns…" he trailed off."Never mind, it's not like we'll be able to tell a difference as long as you don't decide to become schizophrenic on me."

"That one of those alternative problems?"

"Yes it is," he replied."So if you do start hearing voices, or develop a religious mania, or aliens tell you to do things, please keep it away from the job because voices in your head cannot get signatures on packages."He was expecting a sarcastic reply, but Max had gone dead quiet, looking at the ground.She raised her face up, and he was shocked to see tears in her eyes.

"Religious mania?" she asked."That can be because we're low on serotonin?"She sniffed."All he needed was a dose of Tryptophan," she muttered to herself.She jumped off the table quickly, startling Normal.She grabbed her jacket and ran out of the room, promptly falling over Logan waiting for her in the hall.

Logan caught her easily, trying to keep her on her feet.He immediately saw the tears starting to fall down her face."Max, what's wrong?" he asked worriedly.She couldn't talk; she pulled away from him and ran down the hall and out the door.

"What the hell did you say to her?" he demanded of Normal who was staring at the fleeing Max with the same confusion.

"I told her she could be fixed," he replied."Guess she didn't like hearing that."


	8. Confessions

Logan felt a wave of relief when he saw his front door was unlocked

Logan felt a wave of relief when he saw his front door was unlocked.He'd already checked with Original Cindy, and even had driven out to the Space Needle to see if Max's motorcycle was there.Nothing anywhere, and nobody knew why she'd run like that.He knew he'd locked it, and Bling knew to keep it locked if he was here by himself.If it was open then that meant Max had picked it.For once, he wasn't even the slightest bit upset that she had broken in.

She was curled up on his couch; awake, but not moving or acknowledging he was there.She looked like a scared child with tearstains on her cheeks.He wheeled in front of her, and for the first time didn't think about his inabilities and how she deserved a whole man.He held out his arms to her, and she went to him, cuddling on his lap, her head on his shoulder.

He could feel the sobs shuddering through her, but she wasn't making a sound.She was clinging to him, her whole body seeming to try and make contact with part of him.Logan could feel tears in his own eyes in sympathy for her obvious pain.

"Max, I'm sorry I made you go to him," he murmured into her ear."I'm so sorry love, I never thought it would upset you like this."

"My fault," she choked out."I could have saved him, but I killed him instead.I killed my brother and all he needed was Tryptophan.Lydecker was already there.Ben," she sobbed."Ben, I'm so sorry!"Now she started to cry in earnest, and Logan realized what she was saying.

She'd never told him the whole story about what happened to Ben, only that he wouldn't be killing anymore.Still, what the hell did that have to do with anything Normal would have told her?Well, that would all have to wait for later.For now, all he could do was hold her, and stroke her hair, and whisper to her that it was okay, that she couldn't have known.

After a while, Max's tears finally slowed.How could she have known?It wouldn't have mattered anyways.Ben was down, and Lydecker was there, and there was no way to rescue him except how she did.She sat up and looked at Logan, expecting to see the horror and accusation at her admission she'd killed.But there was…compassion, and sorrow for her pain.And there was something else there…something Max couldn't quite define.

He reached up and brushed her tears away.His hand lingered on her cheek, his fingers marveling at the silk of her hair brushing them.Max's trembling hand reached up and touched the corner of his eye.There was moisture there too.She leaned closer and pressed her lips to his.He didn't try to touch her in any other way but his mouth on hers and his hand entangled in her hair.He let her lead the way, and was more than happy to blindly follow wherever she wanted to go.

When she pulled back he didn't try to stop her.If she wanted to leave, he had to let her go no matter how much he wanted to hold her and comfort her."Ben and I got into a fight because I wouldn't let him kill the priest," she said softly."I broke his knee and then we heard Lydecker and his men coming.Ben begged me…he didn't want to go back…he begged me, and I…I had to or he would have been taken…he begged me to do it."Her eyes filled with tears again.

Logan pulled her back to him.So that's what happened.When Bryn said she didn't want to die, they had let her go.Ben said he'd rather be dead, and she'd done as he asked.Which one was the harder choice?Logan had no idea what he would have decided.Send them to Hell, or whatever waited in the beyond? 

"He asked you to," Logan said."It was the best way, Max.He wouldn't have stopped killing, and if he'd gone back they would have hurt him like they did Zack.You did the right thing."A year ago Logan didn't know if he would've been able to say that, but now he knew what it was like to take a life.You did what you had to sometimes.It wasn't pretty, but real life rarely was.It was why he'd finally been able to shred the pictures Lydecker sent him.Manticore wasn't a summer camp.They'd been learning to kill, not how to macramé.How could he blame her for what she had done then, when she'd never been taught the difference between right and wrong?Her grief now proved she knew killing was bad now, and that was what he needed to know for sure she'd risen above Manticore.

"He could have been cured!" she said fiercely, sitting up again."Normal said that we could get like that because we don't have enough serotonin.All he needed was a big dose of Tryptophan and he would have been fine!"

"Do you believe that?" Logan asked levelly, "or do you want to believe that?"

She didn't answer."Max," he continued, "there's a reason why people who were abused as children abuse their kids.They can't rise above themselves and what was done to them.Just because you did, just because you want to keep the darkness behind you and not in you, it doesn't mean all of them could do it."

She put her head back on his shoulder.Damn, she was a perfect fit to his body."I want them to," she said softly."What if Jhondie or Tinga or Krit couldn't do it either?What about Jace and little Max out there somewhere?How do I know they could?"

He looked down at her as she looked up at him.Their eyes met and he smiled.She could feel all of the pain and confusion melt away under that brilliant smile."That," he said firmly, "is what we have hope for."He couldn't help himself.He leaned down and kissed her again.

They snuggled together for a few minutes.Logan wasn't sure if this was Heaven or Hell to have her in his arms, but he didn't care.Letting her go was the last thing on his mind.

"Logan?" she said softly. 

"Hmm?"

"What did you call me earlier when you apologized for sending me to Normal?"

Was that a trick question of some kind?"I called you Max," he said, a little confused.

He felt her stiffen.What did he say?Had he called her something else?Well, after she left yesterday, he'd said some not nice things, but even her genetically enhanced hearing couldn't have picked up on that.He thought back on everything he'd said since coming back into the apartment, and then it hit him.How the hell did he let that slip?Now she would want to know why.Could he say why?Did he even know for sure?

"I said I'm so sorry love," he quoted, knowing full well the consequences.

Her eyes, wide and brown, met his blue ones."Why did you call me that?" she asked suspiciously.

"I…I…" he stammered."I just did," he finished wondering if it sounded as lame as it felt.The sudden anger on Max's face said that it did.She tried to jump up, but he held on to her.

"Let me go before I kick your ass," she snapped.

The emotion broke free before Logan could stop himself."I said it because I meant it!" he yelled into her surprised face.Sweet Jesus, did he just say that?"I mean it Max," he said again, not yelling it this time."I don't want to pressure you, or scare you, or make you say or do anything," he muttered."But, I love you.That's all.I love you."


	9. Morning After

Max stretched the next morning, and nearly jumped out of bed in shock when she felt the body next to her

Max stretched the next morning, and nearly jumped out of bed in shock when she felt the body next to her.Then everything came flooding back and she had to smile.Logan's arm was wrapped around her waist and she could feel herself being held against his chest.God it felt so good to be close to him especially after last night.

After he'd told her he loved her, she had tried to say something, she still wasn't sure what, but only a squeak had come out.He put his finger against her lips."Don't say anything," he whispered.It seemed like the best idea, so she kissed him instead.She wasn't sure if that kiss meant anything, but she wanted to let him know she wasn't going to run after hearing that.If anything, it made her want to stay with him.Where was that coming from?

It started to rain, and so they just snuggled together for a while, watching the rain that had started to fall, occasionally kissing, but not really talking.Max tried to sort out her feelings for Logan, but what were they really?He was her friend, and they could talk and laugh together. He annoyed the hell out of her, but would be so sweet at times like when he would surprise her with dinner after making her think he needed her to do an Eye's Only run.He was the first person who knew her real life history, and had fallen in love with her despite it.

She decided it was safer not to try and figure out what she felt for him tonight.Her head was a mess, and she was going to have to take some Depecote soon.What would that do to her?She went to sit up, but Logan held her against him.She smiled up at him."I have to take my meds," she said.

"Dr. Ronald gave you something?" he asked.He'd tried to ask Normal earlier, but Normal had declared that would violate doctor/patient confidentiality, and refused to say anything.Now Logan knew why Max wanted to choke Normal on a regular basis.

"He gave me Depecote," she replied."But it's in my jacket."

He grinned at her playfully, and then wheeled them both to her jacket.She giggled, realizing that he didn't want to let her off of his lap even for a moment.She got the bottle from her jacket, and took the amount written on the label.She sat there for a moment, wondering if she was going to start seeing purple goats dancing with pink frogs.Nothing was happening.Was that good or bad?

They sat together for a little while longer."Hungry?" Logan finally asked.

"Mmmm?"

"Are you hungry?"

"Tired," she muttered snuggling closer on his shoulder.He could feel her soft breath on his neck."Think the meds are working.Normal said it'd make me sleep."She felt them moving again.

Logan's bed was somewhat lower than an ordinary bed.It made it easier for him to get in and out of the chair.He didn't realize that it would also make it easier for him to reluctantly lift a sleeping Max from his lap and put her in bed.She woke up, and grabbed his hand."Stay," she ordered sleepily.

"Max, baby, I'm going to sleep on the couch," he replied.He would much prefer his bed to the couch, but honor dictated as much.

Max scooted over a little."Don't go," she said, and smiled at him.She patted the side of the bed.There was no way he could refuse that smile and that invitation.He'd crawled into bed with her, and she snuggled against him.Logan thought it would take forever for him to sleep with her against him, but he drifted off with no problems at all. 

Now in the morning light, she rolled over so she could look into Logan's sleeping face.He relaxed totally when he slept.His spiky hair was sticking out in all directions, and she was sure that was a tad bit of drool at the corner of his mouth.He was so cute.His blue eyes opened a little, closed, and then shot open.

He grabbed his glasses off of the nightstand, jamming them on his face quickly.It wasn't a dream.She was really there.Nothing about last night had been a dream at all."Good morning," he said with a huge grin.This was like Christmas morning when he was a kid, except he didn't have to wait to unwrap anything.She was really there.

"Good morning," she replied, smiling at his obvious delight.It was a so weird being with him this close, but she had no intention of moving.Unless he offered to make her waffles.In that case he would be out of the bed and in the kitchen before he could say "with fruit or syrup?"

She happened to glance at the time on his clock beside the bed, and jumped up with a squeak."Oh crap!" she blurted."I never sleep like this!I am going to be so late!Normal's going to kill me!"She started to crawl over Logan to get out of bed. He grabbed her around the waist and leaned up a little to place a kiss on the band of stomach her shirt was exposing.He let her go with a devilish grin.

"Have a good day at work," he said sweetly.

Do not get out of this bed, half of Max's brain ordered.Run like hell, the other half decreed.She had to pee.It might be better not to do it in bed.She got up and ran into the bathroom.After a two-minute shower, she wrapped a towel around her and went into Logan's closet.She'd been keeping a set of clothes here in case hers got filthy during an Eye's Only run.Like she'd never been face first in a mud puddle in the name of Eye's Only before.

She dressed quickly, and ran back into the bedroom.Logan was leaning back against the headboard, watching her.What difference was an extra two minutes going to make?She pounced him in a kiss that left them both breathless.

"Bye," she murmured, and ran out the door.

It took Logan a little while to calm down.He finally got out of bed and headed to the kitchen to get himself some coffee.Some was already percolating.Max didn't do that.Bling.What had he seen?Bling came from around the corner with a huge grin plastered on his face.

"It's not like that!" Logan said firmly.

"Of course not," Bling said placidly."You're just good friends, right?"

"Right," Logan declared.Until Max said she wanted more that was all there could be to it.Hell, unless he got out of the chair that was all there ever could be to it.

Bling went into the bedroom for a minute, and then came back out."Logan?"

"What?"

"I've had good friends in my life," he said with a grin."Never left my underwear with them before."Logan turned blood red.Bling grinned wider.This was going to be a good day.


	10. Jam Pony

"You notice anything weird about Normal this morning

"You notice anything weird about Normal this morning?" Sketchy asked at Jam Pony while trying to put off his first run of the morning.

"He's yelling, bitter, and annoying," Cindy replied."Original Cindy sees nothing unusual in that behavior."

"Max is forty-five minutes late," Sketchy whispered.Cindy knew that already.She knew Logan was worried about her last night, but sister-girl could take care of herself."And Normal hasn't said anything about it," he continued.It was an unusually astute observation for Sketchy.

"There she is," Cindy said, watching Max come through the front bay.She looked like death warmed over though.

"Hey boo," Cindy said, going to her.Damn, Max would like death warmed over if she didn't look so deliriously happy."Where were you last night and what's wrong right now?"

"At Logan's," Max muttered.She grimaced and grabbed her stomach."I threw up twice coming here," she said, and then ran to the bathroom.A lovely retching sound filtered out of the bathroom.

Oh great, Cindy thought when Normal came over."Back off," she ordered him."The girl is obviously sick and don't need nothing from you."

Max came out of the bathroom.She really felt like hell.She'd been doing great when she left Logan's, but then she'd started to feel lousy.The little she'd eaten the day before decided to show back up along with the coffee she'd grabbed on the way to work.What was wrong with her?She was never sick like this.Normal was there.She wanted to ask him, but it wasn't the most appropriate forum in the middle of Jam Pony.

"There's a cot in the storage room," Normal stated."I think you should lay down until you feel better."Everyone's jaw dropped.This was the first time anyone could remember Normal trying to be compassionate towards a sick rider.He didn't say slacker?He didn't give her a package and tell her to work it off?Someone call God, Cindy thought.Hell just froze over.

"Thanks," Max said, and went into the storage room.It was crowded with boxes of old paperwork and some janitorial supplies, but there was a cot in there.She lay down, trying to relax.Some days it didn't pay to be genetically revved.She started to relax a little and dozed for a while.

The opening door woke her.She glanced up and saw Normal.He was carrying a backpack.Maybe she was having a weird dream.No, the place still smelled funny.It was real.

"Max, did you take your Depecote this morning?" he asked in a low voice.

"Yeah," she replied.He wasn't going to blame this on her missing her meds.

"What did you take it with?"

"Coffee."

He gave her a patented Normal sigh."You did read the instructions didn't you?" he asked with a rather superior look."I would have explained them to you so there wouldn't be a mistake, but you ran out too quickly yesterday."

She rolled her eyes."I took the right amount," she retorted."You give me too much or something?"

"So you didn't read the big letters that said 'take with food or milk'?"He already knew the answer to that.He opened the backpack and took out a thermometer and blood pressure cuff.He wanted to make sure she wasn't running a fever or any other possible complications.There was a slight chance she was really sick, but Normal didn't think she'd been designed to get sick easily.He also wanted to make sure she wasn't having an allergic reaction to the meds.

Oops.Well, not really."I didn't take them with anything last night and I was fine," she informed him.

"And your metabolism isn't exactly regular either," he replied calmly."You've got to do what I say or else."He held up the thermometer, and Max opened her mouth.Which was the exact position she was in when Cindy burst through the door.

"All right," Cindy snapped."You do not come in here when my girl is down and start telling her she better be doing what you…" the scene hit her, and she wasn't sure if she was going to pass out or not.Normal was standing in front of Max who was sitting up with her mouth open looking like she wasn't happy about whatever was going to happen next.

Cindy closed the door and very calmly went to Max, kneeling in front of her."Boo," she said gently."Original Cindy knows you not happy about your boy not being able to get it out of neutral, but you can do better than Normal.Sketchy can do better than Normal."

"It's not what you…" Max tried to explain, but Cindy cut her off.

"Max," she said."You are being told this for your own good.Original Cindy will be forced on general principles to bitch slap you if she catches you with Normal.There's no joking with that."

Max looked up at Normal.There was no reasoning with Cindy when she stopped yelling.A quiet Cindy was a Cindy barely keeping herself from killing."She already knows about me," she told him.Cindy looked astonished.Max told Normal?"And," Max continued, "Letting her think that way is just nasty."

"What the hell is going on here?" Cindy managed to ask.

Before Normal could say anything, Max informed her, "This is my neurologist, Dr. Ronald."

"Wait a minute!" Cindy nearly exploded."You telling me that the big shot doc your boy set you up with is NORMAL?"She stood."That bastard asks for Original Cindy's help, and doesn't say a word that it's Normal he sending her boo to?"

"Shut up!" Normal hissed."This does not need to be spread all over by your fellow Neanderthals."He glared at Max."I was promised confidentiality," he snapped.

"I was promised you wouldn't know about my dysfunctional childhood either," she retorted.Max turned her attention to Cindy."Listen, he really is a doctor.Eye's Only did a favor for him, and I did a favor for Eye's Only, and he passed it along.You know how that works."

Cindy did not look convinced.This was Normal for crying out loud!"Max, if you letting him mess with your head, you really do need it examined."

"Mmmhmm," Normal commented in his best arrogant tone."And are you going to cure the seizures?Beer, late nights and wild parties aren't the usual homeopathic cure for such a problem, but I'm sure you've cured, how many people?Zero?Zip?Zilch?"He wrapped the blood pressure cuff around Max's arm."When you treat thousands of patients, then we'll talk.In the meantime, you do have a job to be doing."Cindy just stood there."Bip-bip-bip!" he snapped."There're three hot runs on the counter.Let's go people!"

"Later, OK?" Max asked.Cindy nodded and left."You could have been nicer," she told Normal.

He held up the thermometer."This isn't rectal.I am being nice."


	11. Original Cindy With the Assist

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

2 weeks later…

"Original Cindy is still having a hard time getting over the whole Dr. Normal thing," Cindy commented as she and Max got ready for work.As much as she hated to admit to it, Max had not had a single seizure since she'd gone to Normal.Max had a follow-up appointment today, and Cindy was going to go with Max.She just had to see Normal in a white coat.Maybe then it would sink in.He didn't seem any different any work, but he had this whole secret life.

Max finished brushing her teeth and came out looking for the coffee."He's a whack job but he knows what he's doing," she replied.She looked just a little glum.Cindy was noticing that more and more lately.She also knew the cause of it.

"You and Logan get into it again?" she asked.When Max slept here that meant something not right happened with Logan.

Max shrugged."He just can't get over that I don't care that he's in the chair," she replied.Every time she'd tried to let him know she'd like a little more than cuddling, he'd gotten angry.It was only one part of him that was broken; there were still plenty of other things to do.Was he being selfish?Did he think she would get offended that he didn't?Was he just not thinking that they could do more?Men were impossible.

Cindy thought about it.Damn, she was glad she preferred the female set.She could understand them when they got upset.Still…she was going to have to do something before Max got real upset and did something she would regret, like ending it with Mr. Wheels.

At work Normal gave no indication that anything was different.He screamed bip-bip-bip like a lunatic, and called them all slackers, including Max, and threatened to fire at least four of the riders.It was a typical day at Jam Pony.That afternoon, Normal called out an address, and Cindy nearly snatched it out of Sketchy's hands.

"Hey," Sketchy complained."That's a nice area.If I take the next run, it's in the middle of gang-town central."

"Take Max with you then if you so scared," Cindy retorted."Original Cindy is delivering this package."

"Make sure your newfound enthusiasm for work includes getting the signature," Normal said.He handed Sketchy a package.Sketchy groaned at the address.

"If I come back with one less body part, Natalie is going to be mad at you," he warned Cindy.

"And Original Cindy will make it up to her and her alone," Cindy said.She jumped on her bike and pedaled off.Logan's place was in the building next door to where this package had to be delivered.If someone didn't wake him up soon, he was going to hurt Max, and then she would have to do something she'd rather not, like stomping a cripple.

She made the delivery, and then went to the penthouse.Bling answered the door, and she breezed right on in.Bling had to follow.When Original Cindy showed up, he usually had to go outside and laugh himself sick afterwards.He wished she could make an exception to the all-girl thing.Watching her walk, he could get into that.

Cindy went directly to Logan who was at his computer as usual.She tapped him on the shoulder.He turned around, and tried to smile a little.What the hell?

Cindy slapped his face lightly."That," she declared."Is to wake your stupid self up!All Original Cindy is going to say is that if you keep hurting her boo, she going to come down here and lay the smack down on your skinny white ass."

"You don't…" Logan tried to say, but was cut off.

"Original Cindy knows that you are now the poster child for the Lesbian Not All Men Are Bad In Bed Society.All you have to do is make sure your woman is happy but you can't see past the end of your ego to see that!For some misbegotten reason Max is totally in love with you, and you keep pushing her away.As Original Cindy has already stated, you hurt her boo, she going to lay the smack down on you."

Logan could only stare in disbelief.Max had told Cindy?That was a humiliation he could have done without.Wait.Max is totally in love?Was that right?Did she say that to Cindy?Sweet Jesus.Maybe he had been a little selfish.Max did have needs of her own.He knew he could take care of those.

"Original Cindy is taking Max to her doctor's appointment today," Cindy said firmly."Then Max is coming over here, and you going to make everything better."She walked out without another word.

"One word and you're fired," Logan said to seemingly no one.Bling decided to go up on the roof quickly.He was going to die from holding it in if he didn't.Maybe there were a few things he could do to make sure this was a night both of them would remember.

After work, Max and Cindy went to Max's doctor's appointment.Max was feeling better about the whole doctor thing, but Cindy didn't look so sure.She was glad Max was getting help, but it was still Normal wearing the white lab coat.No headset, but it was still Normal.Even if he was acting like a doctor, asking all the doctor questions, he was still Normal.

"Any seizures?" he asked while examining Max.She shook her head no."Good."He grabbed his stethoscope."Breathe in, hold it, release, okay again," he ordered while checking her respiration."Any headaches, fever, further nausea, rash, constipation or diarrhea?"

"No," Max said tersely.She might be over the fact Normal was a doctor, but she still had a problem talking about bodily functions with him.If he asked for another urine specimen, she was going to hit him.

"Any voices in your head?"

"One that keeps telling me to yell bip-bip-bip.Isn't that a mark of insanity?" she replied acidly.

"I believe it means you're being driven crazy due to being around too many slackers in a day," he replied, not even sounding offended by her in the slightest.He checked her temperature.She was grateful to see the oral thermometer.

"Hey," she finally said to him.She looked a little uncomfortable, and that got Normal's attention.Sarcastic and suspicious he was used to from her, not uncomfortable."I know this isn't you area of expertise and all, but you know the nervous system, so I was just wondering if you knew if there was a medical reason or way to help…oh, never mind, it doesn't matter." She couldn't finish the question.It was too embarrassing.Normal shrugged and went back to whatever he was about to do to her.Luckily Original Cindy needed more than that to be embarrassed.

"Home girl is wanting to know if there's something that can be done to fix a crip's love life in a physical sense," she declared.Max blushed blood red.She muttered about where the break in the spine had occurred, but couldn't make eye contact.

Normal didn't seem fazed at all by the question.So far only Manticore had caught him off balance."Hmm," he thought."Quite often it's both physical and psychological.The patient thinks they can't, therefore they can't.Even if they can get it there, they need pharmacological help to keep things on track."He took out a pad of paper, and wrote the names of several drugs on it."Chances of getting an actual prescription for any of these filled are rather slim, but they're available on the black market if you're willing to pay that much."He handed the paper to Max."But as far as the mental, you're going to have to figure out how to get him over that yourself."

He was all business again."I want to see you again in a month," he ordered."If you have any seizures, let me know so I can do some blood work and check your levels."

"Thanks," Max muttered, still embarrassed by the earlier conversation.

The two girls left.Max slugged Cindy lightly on the shoulder."Why did you say that to him?" she squeaked."Now he knows."

Cindy gave her a think-about-it look."Now you know what you got to do to your boy tonight."She grinned."Original Cindy won't be expecting you tonight at Crash."She waved and walked off.It started to rain a little.Max sighed and started off towards Foggle Towers on her motorcycle.There was no way she could tell Logan about this.None at all.


	12. The Need for Inspiration

The apartment looked great

The apartment looked great.Candles were lighting the rooms in a soft romantic glow.There were roses on the table, and some of the petals were scattered on the tablecloth.He'd brought out the good china and silver even.Something that smelled wonderful was in the kitchen.Logan himself…Logan looked nothing short of divine in his turtleneck sweater and that sexy little "hello" smile.Max realized that she looked like a drowned rat.

"Max," Logan said, looking concerned.She was shivering.He wheeled over to her."There's time before dinner's ready if you want to take a hot shower and you know, whatever it is girls have to do."

"Yeah," Max replied."Girl stuff to do.Mind putting this somewhere that it'll dry?" she asked him, taking off her leather jacket.The rain made her tight shirt and jeans stick to her like a second skin.Damn, she looked good.He took the jacket, and she headed to his bedroom, emerging a second later with his bathrobe, and headed to the bathroom.

Logan took the jacket into the kitchen.It was warm in there, and the leather should dry by the time Max was ready to leave.He heard the shower running.Max was completely naked mere feet from him.Drop it, he ordered himself.Not like you can do anything about it anyways.There was something in Max's pocket.He took out a folded piece of paper.It was damp so he opened it to keep the ink from running.The first line caught his attention, and he read it carefully.It was a list of drugs to induce potency in men, written on a piece of paper that said "From the desk of Dr. Ronald" at the top.The chicken scratch handwriting was most defiantly a doctor's.Logan's eyes narrowed in anger as he crumbled the paper.

Max emerged a while later wrapped in his fluffy red robe.It was way oversized on her, but it smelled like him so much.She liked being wrapped in it.If he wasn't careful she was going to snatch it and take it home.Her hair was in a towel.She'd come out after a quick search revealed he didn't have a hair dryer anywhere in the bathroom.He had to have one somewhere.

Logan was sitting across the room from her.Her smile wilted as she caught the anger in his face and posture.He glanced at something in his hand."Viagra," he read evenly.He continued down the entire list Normal had given her."Thanks Max," he finished sarcastically.

"Logan," she tried to begin but he cut her off.

"Would you mind going home now?I'm not in the mood for dinner now."

"Fine," she snapped.She turned back to the bathroom to get her wet clothes.She stopped and went to him instead.

"As a matter of fact I would mind going home," she said angrily."It's all good for you to set me up to get help with my problems, but you get mad when I'm trying to help you.You know what?It is your problem.I'd say it was ours, but it don't bug me any except that you're acting like a total dope over it."

"Maybe I should just go to the window and shout it for all Seattle to hear," Logan snarled back at her."All beautiful women can come on up.Logan Cale can't do a damn thing about it."

"I asked my doctor a medical question.I been answering all sorts of questions about myself to him."

"You told Cindy," he accused.

"I also told her I'm genetically revved and go into heat every four months or so."She paused, and continued in a much softer tone."In all the world I got two people I can talk to.And one wouldn't talk to me.He'd tell me he loved me in one breath and then ask me to leave in the next because of pride.Pride really sucks."

After a long pause, Logan went to her, feeling bad.He'd been so caught up in his own anger and pain, he forgot he was hurting Max.Cindy told him Max was totally in love with him.Maybe it was true.Maybe not.But he loved her.You don't hurt people you love.Not deliberately."I'm sorry," he said simply.

Max grabbed a chair, and sat down so they were at eye-level."Talk to me," she insisted."Have you tried any of these?"

"Sam prescribed something a few months ago," he told her.It was embarrassing, but it wasn't making him angry.

"And?"

"Max, there haven't been any other women in my life since you came along, and we haven't gone that far."

"You never took it for a test run?" she asked.He blushed at the implication.

"It didn't work," he said flatly.

"Maybe you didn't have the right inspiration," she teased.He went to say something, but she leaned over and kissed him instead.He wasn't sure how, but then she was somehow in his lap, their kissing becoming more passionate.

"Don't you want me?" she whispered to him a little fearfully, hoping he'd understand what she meant.She wanted to be able to trust him with everything in her life.He was the first person ever she'd offered this to, this completion of trust and love.Sex was different.This was different from every other man in her past.

"God, yes," he murmured against her mouth.It wasn't like any part of their relationship had been traditional so far.If this part couldn't be either, then it was just par for the course.She wanted him to be part of her.He could do that.He wanted to do that.

She grinned at him wickedly."You have your meds?"

"Bedroom," he muttered, his mouth busy on her neck.

She got up, ignoring his groan of disappointment."I'll be there in just a minute," she said, and sauntered into the bathroom.


	13. Inspiration Forever

Logan was leaning back against the headboard of his bed fifteen minutes later when Max came back in

Logan was leaning back against the headboard of his bed fifteen minutes later when Max came back in.Sam had told him the drugs he'd given him were some of the strongest on the market and would start acting within twenty minutes or so.If they would work at all, he thought morosely.All thoughts of meds were erased the moment Max walked in.She was still wearing the robe, but she'd towel dried her hair, and let if fall in soft curls around her face.She dropped the robe, and Logan sat up straight, his eyes bulging as he took in her beauty.

Max felt herself flushing a little, but damn that look alone told her she looked good.She'd been digging in her backpack when she got out of the shower looking for her hairbrush, and found a small bag with some bits of white lace and satin.When unfolded, they became underwear.There was a note in the bag from Cindy."Thought your boy looked like the white lace type", it said.Now, with Logan staring at her like she was some kind of goddess in the tiny panties and bra, she was glad to have them.

Logan couldn't move watching her stride towards him, everything she had moving seductively."Max?" he squeaked, his voice breaking like a teenagers.She grinned wider, and moved onto the bed.At that moment, Logan officially stopped caring about anything beyond getting his hands on her.It wouldn't matter if he could do anything or not.His definition of wanting someone took on a whole new level. 

She straddled him, her nose touching his."See," she said in a breathy voice."You just needed the right inspiration."He pulled her to him, his mouth locked against hers.How did she know about him and white lace?Inspiration, meds, whatever it was, it was actually starting to work.Then all conscious thought was gone as their tongues began a sensuous ballet, and his hand slid into the bra on its own volition.

Max moaned against him as he started to caress her breast, his thumb rubbing the hard nipple.He stopped rubbing for a moment, and removed his hand.She looked down at him, her look plain.Stop and die.He grinned back and slowly pulled down the bra straps, trailing them down her arms with his mouth, loving the way she shivered under his touch.God, she tasted wonderful.He unfastened the bra and tossed it away, leaving her bare skin to his view.

Max blushed a little under his gaze.His eyes met hers, and she could see the heat and desire.She wondered if he could see the same in hers.It was so wonderful to be with a man that she could trust.She didn't have to insist on the lights being out so he wouldn't see her barcode.And he loved her.She'd been told that before, but it had been just because they thought it would help them score.It never meant anything.This time she knew it did.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered.He reached up and caressed both of her breasts before letting his mouth close over one dusky peak.She moaned again, grabbing his head to keep him there.He played with her, letting her moves tell him if she wanted more or less, harder or softer.He pulled back a little to move to her other breast, giving it the same loving attention."Perfect," he muttered before closing on it.

Max's gyrations were starting to get to him.If he didn't get her off of his lap quickly, it was going to be over before it began.He wasn't going to disappoint her in any way.Pleasing any other woman in his life, even Valerie, didn't matter to him like pleasing Max did.He never thought he'd have the ability to feel like this again after he was back in the chair.Max was his miracle.His inspiration.His angel.

When Logan took his mouth off of her, Max nearly screamed.He gently pressed her to the side, and she moved so that she was stretched beside him, laying half on his chest.He had slid down so that they were both horizontal.Their eyes locked, for a moment completely open to each other."Logan…" she whispered, more emotion being expressed in that one word than a thousand could do.

He reached up and touched her face tenderly."I know baby," he said softly, and pulled her down for another long, slow kiss.Max started to run her hands over his bare skin.He'd been just in boxers when she came in, and he looked good in them.She had a feeling he'd look better out of them.She broke off the kiss long enough to peel the boxers off of him, letting her mouth follow their path off his stomach, down his leg, sucking on his big toe.Logan knew he couldn't actually feel her mouth on his legs, but just the sight alone was better than actually feeling it.Max, with just a tiny thong covering her, was running her mouth over his body.It was better than every dream he'd had of her.

She came back up so that they could kiss again.Damn, he did look better without them.She was going to have to keep him like this more often.His arms were muscled, chest broad, shoulders strong.His waist was flat, the skin taunt under her touch.His legs were a bit thin, but intense physical therapy had kept them from becoming droopy looking.

Max reached down, her fingers teasing his skin, until they finally ran up the length of his erection."Oh my God," he half-sobbed as her hand closed around the hard shaft.For a moment his expression could have been mistaken for agony the pleasure was that intense.He let her start stroking him, the waves of pleasure more intense than anything he could remember from before.

He finally had to grab her hand and pull it away.She looked disappointed for a moment, but he rolled her onto her back, twisting so that he was on his side next to her.He teased at her breasts with his hands while his mouth trailed on her neck.She was writhing on the bed, but he wasn't about to let this end so soon.He let his hand slide over the soft skin of her belly, and then finally disappear under the bit of satin covering her femininity from his view.

She nearly came off of the bed as his fingers began to explore her.Logan kissed her hard, finally grabbing the edge of her panties, yanking them off to leave her totally exposed to his gaze.She was nothing short of exquisite.He started to touch her again, sliding a finger inside of her while his thumb kept rubbing.From the way she was tensing and whimpering, it wasn't going to be long for her either.

"I need you love," he said to her, letting her decide if she wanted to complete the act with him.

"I need you too," she said back, and then rolled over so that she was completely on top of him.She sat up on him, not losing eye contact for a moment.She rose up a little, and then sank down on him, letting him penetrate her slowly.Both of them were gasping for breath when she finally settled on him completely, savoring the moment they'd both imagined a thousand times before.

Max started to move on him, not able to keep it slow.She wanted everything from him.He reached up and stroked where their bodies were joined, prodding her into a frenzy."Logan!" she sobbed."Logan…I…I…oh, God I've always…OH MY GOD," she damn near screamed as her climax hit her like a tidal wave.The feel of her body contracting around him was all Logan needed to send him over the edge.It wasn't an orgasm.It was a tactical nuke.

Then Max was collapsed on his chest, trembling slightly.Logan wrapped his arms tightly around her, stroking her back and hair.He wasn't sure if he was still alive after that or not.He'd been told that there might be partial sensation.He hoped that if this were partial, it would never improve.Any more and it would have killed him.

"Logan," Max murmured.She tried to move, but her body refused to go anywhere.

"Sleep love," he ordered gently.That seemed like a good idea to her.She moved off of him, and rested her head on his shoulder.For someone who didn't sleep, she was out in a second.Logan pulled a blanket over them both with the last bit of his energy, and drifted off beside her.

Some time later Logan awoke to see a set of beautiful brown eyes staring at his face.He smiled at Max, wrapping an arm around her and using his free hand to play with her hair."You're still beautiful," he said softly to her.She smiled back, but a little uneasily."What's wrong?" he asked.He didn't really want to, but if she thought this was a mistake, it was better to know now than later.

"I could be happy with you," she finally said sadly.

"That's a bad thing?"

"It is when you're a genetically engineered killing machine who can't settle down anywhere!" she cried out."Eventually I'm going to have to move on and leave Seattle and everything, and I don't want to have my heart broken when I do!"

She started to cry.He hugged her close, trying to find the right words."I want a real life," she said."I want to be normal.I want to have someone who loves me and I can love him and not be afraid that I'm going to have to run away from everything.I just want to know it's going to last."

"Max," Logan said, "nobody can see the future.I know what the now is.And I know right now you have someone who loves you.Who isn't going to leave you."He tilted her face up so that he could look into her eyes again."You can't change who you are.I wouldn't want to change anything about you at all.And I am so glad I don't have Normal in my bed right now."

She got the double entendre and started to laugh.After a second, Logan joined in.They calmed down, and she asked, "What if I do have to leave?"

"That's a bridge we might have to cross one day," he replied."But if we have to, then we'll cross it together.I'm not letting you get away from me easily."

She smiled brilliantly."I love you Logan."

"I love you too Max."

They kissed again.A kiss of promise.Of hope.Of the future that was theirs.Together.

THE END


End file.
